Should I have hope?




'Ello peoples. Well, I did it. I went out last night. Got ahold of comedian buddy and met him at Ben's Half Yard House. I got in 2 songs and he got in 3. I wasn't completely happy with mine. The first one, "It's My Life" by Bon Jovi, I cracked on a note. Sounded just like I had hit puberty onstage. The second one, "Billy the Kid" by Billy Dean, it just took me a little bit to get comfortable with it. I hadn't done that one in awhile. So, not my best night of singing, but, far from my worst I'm sure. Tonight comedian buddy said he is going to McCarty's, so, that is what the plans are for tonight. He needs to verify that he will be performing there on New Year's Eve. He also let me know that he has to be there on Tuesday night. The comedian that normally MC's is on vacation and my buddy said he would fill in.

Now, onward to this post's title: "Should I have hope?". It is a real question I am asking. I am 41 years old. 42 in less than 3 months. I have never been married. And, never REAL close. So, should I HONESTLY still have hope that it can happen. I do know the answer. I should not continue to pretend that it can still happen. The only person that I have been fooling is myself, and, I can't even pull that off any longer. Usually, I can hold out that little bit of hope that someone will answer an email that I sent through a dating website. But, I am not a paying member of any of them now. So, no paid membership, no emails. I also don't have any upcoming events that I can tell myself will be real good opportunities to meet anyone. OK, New Year's Eve is the one single chance I have. If I don't meet anyone that night, then my chances come to an end. Yea, yea, yea, I know, "You always have chances". But that isn't the truth. When I am in a club and I get ZERO interest by everyone in the place, it is time to face the truth. I AM NOT GOOD DATING/MARRIAGE MATERIAL. Let's be honest, I wouldn't even want to date me. And, if everyone reading is COMPLETELY HONEST, they would say the same thing. OK, even if I was the opposite sex, nobody would want to date me. So, after New Year's Eve, I should honestly start to prepare for my declining years being alone.

Until next time, don't get your panties in a wad.