A few more minutes



Well, I'm still at work right now. I've got a few more minutes then I'm outta here for the day. I haven't heard from comedian buddy in awhile. Last I heard from him, he was out of town for training at his new job this week. So, I'm guessing that means I won't hear from him this weekend. That's cool. It will help me settle into the rest of my life. I am going out on Friday night however. It is another "boy's night out". From 6 till about 10 this time. One guy, Boomhower, can't stay late. Not a problem. It will either be an early night for me, or, I might hit another place afterwards. Who knows. And, I'm gonna do Ben's Half Yard House on Saturday night. I've just got to get used to going out by myself. Lonely, yes. Necessary, yes.

OK, I'm outta here now. Gotta rush home for Survivor & the CSI season premier and the ER season premier. Later.

Mr. Disposable


Have you ever had a thought pop into your mind and you knew instantly that it was right? You might not have even been searching for that answer, but, it is 100% correct. I had that happen tonight. After not going out the last 2 Saturdays, and not going out last night (Friday night) and not going out last Tuesday night, I decided I would go out even if I had to go alone. So, I'm sitting at Ben's Half Yard House drinking my rum & cokes and this thought pops into my head. I'm honestly amazed that I have never realized this before. Here it is: I am a disposable friend! Yep, that's the thought that popped into my head. Even before I started to look back at my life I knew it was true. I'm a person that other people think of as a "friend" when it is convienent for them. When they need an extra person to hang out with. When they need someone to do things with. But, as soon as they have a real friend, I'm "disposable". Yep, kicked to the curb. Why else would people that I used to do things with on a weekly basis all of a sudden not be able to find the time to even pick up the phone and give me a quick call? I'm not happy to realize what I am to others, but, it does answer lots of questions. Such as why 4 of my closest friends all got married and I wasn't best man at ANY of their weddings. At one time or another in my life, I have considered all 4 of them my best friend. Yet never a best man. Ding! Disposable friend.

Well, enough for now. I've gotta get to bed and try to get some sleep. Even though the song is true: This empty bed is a night alone.

LONELY OLD MAN - TAKE 2


OK, I've seen my future for a 2nd straight weekend. Comedian buddy and I went out on Friday night to our normal "2nd Friday of each month Karaoke" place. I did a little drinking. A bit more than my normal 1 or 2. I was feeling good. Sang 3 songs, all ones I've never sang before. Comedian buddies 2 kids were both there. So, he was spending more time chatting with them than with me. Not a problem.

On Saturday, I got a call from Comedian buddy and he wasn't going to go out that night. So, I did not leave the condo all day Saturday. In fact, I didn't leave the condo all day Saturday AND all day Sunday. The best thing about doing that is that it cuts down my expenses. No gas used. No fast food bought. NO money spent. And it does give me a really good glimpse at my future. It won't be long before Comedian buddies daughter finishes high school and he and his ex-wife to be can get divorced. Once that happens, he is planning to move out of Texas. He really doesn't like living in this state. So, I need to get used to the fact that I'm going to be spending most of my time sitting at home. I get lonely when I'm home all weekend, but, if I spend most of that time in bed sleeping, then I'm OK. I think that is my gameplan. Sleep my life away.

To top off the bad weekend, I called Comedian buddy on Tuesday night and he was "in for the night". No karaoke, no comedy. I was good with that since going out on Tuesday night just kills me on Wednesday. But, it is something to get used to.

On to the only sliver of good news I have to share. I'm taking a vacation in December this year. I'm going with my sister, her hubby and my neice & nephew to visit our step-mother. This will be the first time we have been up to Minnesota since my Dad passed away last year. It won't be my ideal vacation (Las Vegas or New Orleans Marti-Gras), but, it will be a vacation. One thing we are planning to do is visit the Mall of America. They have a Van's shoe store, so, I can get me a new pair of Van's. I bought 2 pair there the last time we went up, but, it's about time to get more.

I've seen my future.



And I didn't like what I saw. Of course, there isn't much I can do to change things. I can't make a female want to be with me. I can't make my friends want to spend more time with me. Yep, I've seen my future.

OK, here is how things went and why I'm saying what I'm saying. OK, holiday weekend. Got off work on Friday at noon and have Monday off. I went out Friday night, met my comedian buddy and his other half. Wasn't a great night. We went to McCarty's, which is a great place. It is the place where my buddy does his Tuesday night shows from time to time. I really like the place, it just isn't the best place to meet single females at. And, I didn't. Of course, I didn't expect to, so, no surprise.

Now here is how the rest of the weekend went and what I have to look forward to. We were planning on going out on Saturday night to Ben's Half Yard House. I got a phone call from comedian buddy letting me know he wasn't feeling up to going out Saturday night. So.... I sat at home, by myself, all day Saturday, Saturday night, all day Sunday and Sunday night. I didn't see a single person, didn't talk to anyone on the phone. Nobody! That is my future. Lot's of TV watching. That is it. And eating. Maybe I can actually eat myself to death. What a plan!

Well, I've been checking the new dating website I joined. I've been sending out "Icebreakers". Saving people to my bookmarks. Nothing. Yep, nobody that sees my pic and reads my profile wants anything to do with me. It is almost cool. Like I have a losing streak to keep intact.

Yep, this was my lonely weekend.